THOUGHTS AND FEELINGS

Soooooo.

Hi y'all! 

It's been a minute, and I know I had promised to stop ghosting y'all...but hear me out? 

I was deep into writing a fiction novel. I was so serious about it, and I wrote over 25K words during NaNoWriMo. But then....

dun dun dun (pretend that's like super suspenseful movie music please)

I got on the toxic side of booktok. The side where no matter what an author says or does they're vilified regardless. I saw multiple people leave one star reviews for books that aren't even out yet on both Goodreads and Amazon to the point that the book which isn't scheduled to be released for a few years already has a 1-2 star rating. 

And don't be the person that says, "well review spaces aren't for authors" because DUH. But anyways, shouldn't review spaces have some integrity? Shouldn't you only review a book you've actually read? Otherwise, as a reviewer you're also violating the review space. 

To be fair to everyone involved I usually only come in at the tail of any drama because I'm just never involved in it, so I never really know what happened in the moment. I just see "hot takes" later. But all of it turned me off of the majority of booktok. I haven't seen it be as negative on instagram, but that could just be the people I'm following are better. 

And I'm not saying to not have negative reviews. By all means if you read a book and it wasn't for you then leave your review. However, I also think that there is a way to do critical reviews without being a dickhead. If your content is entirely overly harsh critical negative reviews and you seem to hate every single book you read, then I'm probably not going to follow you. 

I just know that once I write my books...then they are out there. In the public space, and at that point I simply have to ignore any criticisms I come across that simply are rude and not well meaning. I'm just not sure I have it in me to not snap back. 

Anyway, at this point I've tabled my fictional novel. I'm only still working on the memoirs. Because if someone doesn't like those then what? It's my literal life...so sorry that the story didn't turn out like you want. Go fuck yourself. (that's what I'll say in my head). Happy to be back blogging! 

Love y'all!